More Orgasm Evidence (in Case We Needed It)

Lots of attention has focused on the finicky female orgasm in recent years, from Dr. Rosemary Basson’s model of the female sexual response cycle to the helpful finding of just how female anatomy influences the probability of vaginal orgasm.

A new study from Chapman University, Indiana University, and the Kinsey Institute colored in some details of female sexual response, in part by rounding up a wide net of participants. Over 52,000 men and women between the ages of 18 and 65 responded to an online survey, including a more robust sample of those who identify as gay, lesbian, and bisexual.

The take-away from all this analysis was the jaw-dropping finding (tongue in cheek) that men (95 percent) orgasm dependably, while women, not so much (65 percent). About 44 percent of women said they rarely or never reach orgasm with vaginal intercourse alone, a number that is quite low compared to other studies suggesting that fully 70 percent of women don’t orgasm with vaginal penetration. These numbers point (again) to some very significant differences in sexual response, which in turn, lead to significant misunderstanding between Venus and Mars.

“About 30 percent of men actually think that intercourse is the best way for women to have orgasm, and that is sort of a tragic figure because it couldn’t be more incorrect,” said Dr. Elisabeth Lloyd, a professor of biology at Indiana University and author of The Case of the Female Orgasm in this article.

Additionally, while 41 percent of men think their partner orgasms frequently, far fewer women (33 percent) say they actually do orgasm. The researchers note that this difference could be due to women faking orgasm for several reasons: “to protect their partner’s self-esteem, intoxication, or to bring the sexual encounter to an end.”

The researchers were particularly interested in the disparity between how dependably lesbian women orgasm (89 percent) versus heterosexual women (that 65 percent figure). They theorize that this is due, in part, to women having a better anatomical understanding of each other’s needs.

The headliner result of all those survey is a “Golden Trio” of sexual moves that the researchers say are almost guaranteed to induce the Meg Ryan-style “Yes! Yes! Yes!” in women: clitoral stimulation, deep kissing, and oral sex. Even without vaginal penetration, 80 percent of heterosexual woman and 91 percent of lesbian women were able to orgasm dependably with this magic trio. (Although deep kissing and oral sex seem either mutually exclusive or tremendously acrobatic.)

The research noted that women who orgasm more frequently also have sex more frequently and are more likely to be satisfied with their relationships. Whether satisfying sex is the chicken or the egg—a contributor to a satisfying relationship or an effect of a good relationship, it’s safe to say that the two go hand-in-hand. Good sex and good relationships are both enhanced when partners communicate about what works and include a healthy dollop of fun and flirtation.

“I would like [women] to take that home and think about it, and to think about it with their partners and talk about it with their partners,” said Lloyd. “If they are not fully experiencing their fullest sexual expression to the maximum of their ability, then I think our paper has something to contribute to their wellbeing.”