In my last post, I talked about the importance of touch and foreplay, and encouraged you and your partner to talk about where you like to be touched—and how. Here are some top erogenous zones, according to several sources I’ve run across. Use this as a starter kit, and let us know if you discover something new.
Starting from the top:
Head and scalp. Who doesn’t like a scalp massage? Our scalp is loaded with nerve endings and experts say massaging it releases endorphins. This may be more feel-good than erotic, but who cares? Use fingertips, then fingernails to mix things up.
Some lists mention kissing the forehead, which reminds me more of mommy, but that could be sweetly intimate as well. One woman mentioned an erotic link between her forehead and her lower back, which begins “aching to be touched” when her forehead is kissed. Hmmm. Worth a try.
And of course, there are the ears. Blow gently. Make small, firm circles with your fingers along the outer rim. Massage the earlobe. Does that feel good?
Neck. Exquisitely sensitive, even ticklish to some, the neck is worth exploring. Try tongue, fingers, light touch and other textures. “The moment between feeling breath then feeling lips, tongue, teeth is incredible. It's the combination of anticipation and pleasure foreshadowing what's to come,” says one woman in this Huffington Post article.
Armpit. I wouldn’t have thought of this one, but apparently, it’s a hottie. Try licking and a somewhat firm touch so as not to tickle.
Breasts and nipples. This body part is too obvious, but the thing about breasts and nipples is that the right touch is orgasmic and the wrong touch is downright painful, so you’ll have to teach your partner how you like it. This goes in spades for women who’ve had a mastectomy. Your partner needs to know if and how you like to be kissed or touched in this area.
Lower abdomen. This part can be highly erogenous for men and women. Use a feather or light touch in circles from the navel. Head south. Men especially like the anticipation of light touch on their lower abs. For men “…the area of the abdomen between the navel and pelvis is a fun area to tantalize, and as blood flows to the pelvis and sexual tension gathers, it’s a good area to simulate,” says Dr. Ian Kerner, a sex expert in New York City in this Woman’s Day article.
Mons. A little farther south on women, Dr. Michael Krychman, a medical advisor to MiddlesexMD, recommends attention to that little mound above our genitals. The mons “… can also be interesting when incorporated into the sexual repertoire. Caressing the hair area or gentle touch to this area can be exciting and pleasurable.”
Inner thigh. “The gift wrapping to his package,” says this source. I say that we women like erotic touch on our inner thighs, too. Breathe, kiss, stroke lightly. It all feels good. Pay special attention to what’s called the “cut lines” in men—those creases where thigh meets torso. Try licking or kissing his abdomen while stroking the cut lines. Kind of like rubbing your tummy and patting your head, but maybe worth the effort for him.
Back of knees. This is an oft-mentioned sensitive spot for both men and women, the back of the knees can be ticklish, and may be more sensitive in men because it’s less hairy. “Some women find this area especially exciting and pleasurable when showered with gentle touch or caresses,” says Dr. Krychman. Try using massage oil on the legs and thighs.
Feet. Ever the focus of fetishists, the feet have their own beauty and sensitivity. What feels better than a foot rub? (Okay. Maybe a scalp massage.) Some people have a direct sexy link from the arch of their foot or their heel. Others just like the yumminess of it all. Why not spend a night on feet? Or, work up from the feet.
Or start at the top and work down. Or… ?
Dr. Barb DePree, M.D., has been a gynecologist and women’s health provider for almost 30 years and a menopause care specialist for the past ten.